How to Help Women Feel Comfortable Sharing Taboo Purchases
Typical audience research in advertising relies heavily on the individual rather than the communities where they live and the people they’re connected with. There’s an overreliance on personas—what are typical demographics, educational history, marital status, purchasing habits, and more of your ideal customers? But nobody exists in a vacuum, and women's social ties significantly influence their engagement with taboo product and service brands. If we can map women’s social behavior in the context of taboo purchases, we can help brands reach women more effectively.
Think about it. Women form word-of-mouth networks across the internet and in their personal lives, talking about brands that have met their needs effectively and improved their quality of life.
But there’s a difference between discussing the best skincare serum they’ve ever used and singing the praises of their new vibrator. Taboos come with a lot of social baggage that can limit how willing women are to talk about these products/services. We can talk all day long about the importance of increased access to vibrators, but how many women are truly comfortable talking about what vibrators they use, how they use them, and more — those personal details that so many tend to keep, well, personal.
Our research shows most women are talking about taboo purchases with people in their social networks. But to reach the women who would benefit most, brands need to make it easier for women to talk openly about their experiences. The first step might be starting and facilitating those general conversations so that women can ease into sharing more personal details.
Think of how much better the world would be if women were more comfortable talking about taboos. What if women didn’t feel fear, embarrassment, or shame talking about the aging products they use every day or their financial journeys, for example?
Let’s draw that map so it’s easier for brands to remove the barriers to sharing. After decades of brands perpetuating the shroud of secrecy around these products/services, it’s time brands embrace accountability and take a stand.
Women share taboo purchases with people they know.
Do you think women tell their close friends when they buy sex toys? The answer might surprise you (54% do).
Women’s social circles may be smaller, but they’re active. Products/services they buy become conversation pieces with friends and family. As noted above, about half of women will talk about their newest vibrator, g-spot stimulator, dildo, etc., with a close friend. Many do NOT keep the discussion of these purchases in the bedroom. But there are nearly as many that do favor privacy.
Brands have a unique opportunity to turn their products/services into an icebreaker for women to discuss what truly improves their lives. How? By making women more comfortable talking openly, liberally, and expansively about their experiences with these taboo products/services.
So here’s what you need to know to facilitate these dialogues.
Women typically share taboo purchases with close friends, family members, and spouses—relationships with the most emotional intimacy. That’s your point of entry. Encourage sharing with people they feel comfortable with, keep building that confidence, and expand from there. But your approach will differ depending on the taboo.
For example, women are less likely to share sex product purchases with non-partner family members (not shocking to us). The same goes for cannabis. They’re equally likely to tell a spouse or close friend about cannabis purchases. If you sell these products, encourage sharing with a spouse/partner or close friends.
Women typically share financial services purchases with their spouses, followed closely by close friends and family members. Start with those primary relationships if you’re in the financial sector and want to connect authentically with women. Encouraging them to dispel the shame and be open can lead to sharing with others in their lives or even publicly.
Women are more likely to share mental health, alcohol, and aging product purchases with a close friend by a slim margin—more than with a spouse/partner. Friendships can be a source of recommendations and a safe space to share experiences.
Who are women refraining from sharing their purchasing information with? Unsurprisingly, supervisors or managers at work. According to our research, women are concerned about making others uncomfortable and negatively influencing how they’re perceived. That ol’ social conditioning to please others. Work environments are rife with pressure to be perceived a certain way, to be palatable, to blend in. But maybe it’s time to ruffle some feathers. What would it look like if businesses communicated, “We welcome your whole person to this office, and we mean it.” Can we make it okay for women to talk about their preferred strains of cannabis or their boggling collection of perimenopause symptoms with their coworkers?
Women across segments are least likely to share this kind of information with their social media network or publicly on social media. Taboos are still alive and well, so the hesitation is easy to understand.
Many brands believe user-generated content is the holy grail and can extend your brand presence in an advertising landscape that can be restrictive with taboo products and services. The thing is, you have to help women feel comfortable enough to go public with their brand perceptions. Brands need to intentionally engage women and inspire them to create/share content about your products/services. Influencing the influencers is one way to spark a movement.
What would the world look like if women felt comfortable discussing taboos in many different contexts?
Every woman is different.
Even though our research shows common threads amongst women —87% share alcohol purchases with others, for example—we can’t base advertising strategies on similarities alone. Women are incredibly unique depending on our backgrounds, values, personalities, and life paths. That’s why we at Fancy pursued attitudinal segmentation research—we wanted to understand how to reach women with different perceptions, beliefs, struggles, and preferences.
Here are some nuances to help brands clarify women’s sharing behavior. For more on the segments themselves and what kind of women fall into them, take a gander at this previous blog, which is all about that.
Brand Approvers, our segment that values privacy, are significantly less likely than the other segments to share with anybody. Our most reserved segment (they’re not leading the revolution like Boundary Pushers), these women need a light, comfort-building touch from brands. You may even consider skipping this segment and creating widespread change through Boundary Pushers and Female Favorers first, ultimately making engaging Brand Approvers easier.
Brands can (and should) encourage women to share.
If you want women to share information about your brand and products/services, give them a compelling, relevant, and shame-minimizing reason. Not all women are completely comfortable talking about these topics, especially on social media. So, for content to be shareable, it needs to start or be a part of conversations women want to have.
What else can you learn about the ins and outs of women’s sharing behavior? What do those conversations look like, sound like, and feel like? Seek to understand. You can ask the women who work for your brand, interview customers, and more.
Then, target by segment.
Your Boundary Pushers may resonate with more provocative messaging while the Female Favorers respond to empowerment. Brand Approvers want their privacy respected, so use a subtle touch and aim for support, not controversy. You’ll have less discomfort to overcome with the Boundary Pushers and the most with Brand Approvers, so adapt your messaging accordingly.
But a few standards work for everyone when engaging your customers and prospects:
Be educational.
Be thoughtful.
Be inspiring.
Need an assist? We’re here to help. Email us at hello@fancynyc.com to join the conversation and craft better ads.
