I’m Katie Keating and I have my period.

I’m Erica Fite and I don’t have a period anymore.

Erica and Katie took to the stage at Adweek’s Women Trailblazers event and immediately began questioning why we can’t discuss things that are inherently a part of being female. These normal aspects of everyday life have been made so taboo, so shameful, that we’re afraid to even mention them to anyone but out closest friends. Things like menstruation—and her big-sister, menopause—, finance, sex, mental health, cannabis, aging, etc. have all been so stigmatized that we’ve become afraid, uneducated, and ashamed.

They spoke about how Fancy is working to change this through frank discussion and work that normalizes the conversation and shifts the cultural needle. Our work in these “taboo” categories, in addition to 20 years of being women (who inevitably age—that’s how time works) in advertising has given us unique perspective on what it takes to really connect with women today.

1. Be Honest. Acknowledging the truth about what happens in a woman’s body, throughout her life, in her mind, will make it easier to talk about. And when she’s talking about her experience she’ll know you’re in the conversation with her.

2. Be Kind. Be the friend that offers advice, helps out, asks for nothing in return. Not the one that makes it all about you.

3. Be Real. Life is funny. We all know it. There’s no reason to take everything so seriously all the time. If the humor is based on a real insight that can be shared she’ll know you really understand her and what she’s experiencing.

4. Be Patient. There are conversations that even though the world might not be ready for them, some women are, and if you engage them, they’ll be the messengers with their friends and the dialogue will begin to change. And when it does you’ll be there with a lot to say.

Unfortunately, the speech wasn’t recorded, but the Lion’s Den sex-toy work which brings the above points to light can be seen here.